It’s time for some funny accounting jokes. If you are an accountant and need a little relaxation from figures and numbers, we have collected the the best book-keeping jokes for you to make you smile.
The accountant had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time.
The little girl was fascinated by the story, especially the part where the pumpkin turns into a golden coach.
Suddenly she piped up, «Daddy, when the pumpkin turned into a golden coach, would that be classed as income or a long-term capital gain?»
You need a budget
How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb?
«What kind of answer did you have in mind?»
Two, one to change the light bulb and one to check that it was done within the given budget or not.
Some short accounting Jokes
Wife to husband as they watch their young son playing: “He’s such a sensitive child. Let’s wait until he’s older before we tell him you’re an accountant.”
What’s a shy and retiring tax accountant?
A tax accountant who is half a million shy and that’s why he is retiring.
What’s an extroverted accountant?
One who looks at your shoes while he’s talking to you instead of his own.
Why accountants don’t read novels?
Because, the only numbers in them are page numbers.
Ethics in accounting
The managing partner in an accounting firm is very annoyed with one of his junior partners and has called him in to chastise him.
«How could you possibly advise the client in the way you did?
That was completely unethical. We are always conscious of Ethics in this firm. You do know what Ethics is don’t you?»
The young partner is offended. «Of course I know what Ethics is. It’s a county in southern England.»
A young accountant, straight out of university, applies for a job advertised in the local newspaper. He is interviewed by the owner of a small business who has built it up from scratch.
«I need someone with a bachelors in accounting degree» says the man, «but mainly I’m looking for someone to do my worrying for me.»
«How do you mean?» says the accountant.
«I have lots of things to worry about, but I want someone else to worry about money matters.»
«OK,» says the accountant. «How much are you offering?»
«You can start on seventy-five thousand,» says the owner.
«Seventy-five thousand dollars. How can a business like this afford to pay so much?»
«That,» says the man, «is your first worry.»