{"id":1335,"date":"2020-05-05T19:06:59","date_gmt":"2020-05-05T19:06:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/?p=1335"},"modified":"2020-11-16T09:21:16","modified_gmt":"2020-11-16T09:21:16","slug":"the-parking-lot","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/jokes\/funny-jokes\/the-parking-lot\/","title":{"rendered":"The parking lot"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Recently a routine police patrol was parked outside a local neighborhood tavern. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing.<br>After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five vehicles, the man managed to find his car, which he fell into. He was there for a few minutes as most of the other patrons left the bar and drove off.<br>Finally, he started the car, switched the wipers on and off, flicked the indicators on and off, tooted the horn, and then switched on the lights.<br>He moved the vehicle forward a few inches, reversed a little, and then remained stationary for a few more minutes as more patrons left in their vehicles.<br>At last he pulled out of the parking lot and started to drive slowly down the road. The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, and promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyzer test. To his amazement, the breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at all!<br>Dumbfounded, the officer said <em>\u00abI&#8217;ll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken\u00bb<\/em>.<br><em>\u00abI doubt it\u00bb<\/em>, said the man. <em>\u00abTonight I&#8217;m the designated decoy\u00bb.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<hr class=\"wp-block-separator\"\/>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-align-center\">You must also read the joke <a href=\"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/jokes\/funny-jokes\/punched-in-the-face\/\">Punched in the face<\/a>!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Recently a routine police patrol was parked outside a local neighborhood tavern. Late in the evening the officer noticed a &#8230; <a title=\"The parking lot\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/jokes\/funny-jokes\/the-parking-lot\/\" aria-label=\"Read more about The parking lot\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1337,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[80],"tags":[752,751,753,127],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1335"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1335"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1335\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1337"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1335"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1335"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1335"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}