{"id":1508,"date":"2020-06-07T18:44:31","date_gmt":"2020-06-07T18:44:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/?p=1508"},"modified":"2020-11-16T09:17:54","modified_gmt":"2020-11-16T09:17:54","slug":"the-grim-reaper","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/jokes\/adult-jokes\/the-grim-reaper\/","title":{"rendered":"The Grim Reaper"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can’t seem to keep a job. Instead of actively looking for work, he likes to sit around at home. One Saturday, the dentist is hungry, and puts his brother on the spot. He tells him to get off his lazy behind and go get them some food. After some protest, the lazy brother takes the car and leaves for the store. In the meantime, the dentist takes a nap on his day off. He turns off his phone so he won’t be interrupted.

About 30 minutes later, the lazy brother gets into a head-on collision in the intersection by the grocery store. His vital signs are fading; he’s unconscious and barely moving. An ambulance picks him up and rushes him to the hospital. He ends up in the Emergency Room under observation, but his condition is critical. They try calling his dentist brother, but he doesn’t pick up because his phone is off.

The dentist wakes to a knock on the door. Suspecting a solicitor, he ignores it, but the knocking continues. Eventually, he resolves to get up and yell at the person at the door. When he does, he reveals— the grim reaper. He is just as he appears in movies; a full skeleton underneath a tattered cloak.

The grim reaper swears. \u00abOh no! This always happens with identical twins\u00bb.<\/em>

\u00abWhat do you mean?\u00bb<\/em> asks the dentist.

\u00abWell… if you must know, your brother was in a critical car accident, and I’ve come to take him to the underworld. I’m afraid his time on Earth has ended.\u00bb<\/em>

The dentist is noticeably upset. He says \u00abWait! Isn’t there some way I can challenge you for my brother’s life? After all, YOU made the mistake. Certainly there must be a way I can bargain for his life.\u00bb<\/em>

The grim reaper asks \u00abWhat do you have in mind?\u00bb<\/em>

The dentist thinks. \u00abHow about a challenge? If I beat you, you let my brother go free.\u00bb

The grim reaper laughs. \u00abI will beat you in any challenge. What challenge do you propose?\u00bb<\/em>

The dentist smiles. \u00abI propose we see who has the cleanest teeth. 5 minutes of brushing each, then we decide.\u00bb<\/em>

\u00abVery well\u00bb<\/em> says the grim reaper, who makes his way to the bathroom.

Once there, he pulls back his tattered cloak to reveal his skull. It’s glistening. He takes a toothbrush from the bathroom, loads it with toothpaste, and brushes. After 5 minutes, the shiniest teeth anyone has ever seen glisten and make the room bright. The grim reaper grins. \u00abYou are foolish human. But, you are entitled to your chance.\u00bb<\/em>

The dentist takes another toothbrush, loads it with toothpaste, and starts brushing like a madman. When his 5 minutes are up, he spits out the paste. He smiles.

It’s unbelievable.

The shine from the dentist’s teeth is so beautiful that he can see the grim reaper’s reflection in his perfectly clean teeth.
The winner is obvious. The grim reaper hangs his head in shame. \u00abYou win, human. This time. Your brother will live.\u00bb<\/em> He disappears in a puff of smoke. At the same instant, the bed-ridden brother wakes up in the hospital. Not only is he uninjured, he seems perfectly healthy. Suddenly, the phone by his bed rings. It’s his brother, the dentist. He picks up. \u00abHey bro. You’ll never believe what happened. Apparently, I went out to the market and got hit by a car. They say I almost died.\u00bb<\/em>

The dentist smiles on the phone and says. \u00abThat’s interesting, bro. Today you might say that I also had a brush with death.\u00bb<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n\n\n\n

Have you read these ice cream puns<\/a> or these jokes for your boyfriend<\/a>?
Maybe you would like an ed sheeran love quote<\/a>!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There are two identical twin brothers that live together. One happens to be a well-respected dentist, and the other can’t … Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1512,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[87],"tags":[1174,102,1172,691],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1508"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1508"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1508\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1512"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1508"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1508"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokes-and-riddles.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1508"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}