Punched in the face

A man shows up to work with a black eye…
His co-worker Peter asked him «Where’d you get that shiner from, Dan? Have you been punched in the face?»

«You won’t believe it,» Dan said, «But I got it at church this weekend.»

Peter: «How the hell do you manage to get a black eye at church?»

Dan: «Well I was sitting behind this big fat lady and when we stood up to sing hymns I noticed her dress was stuck in her buttcrack so I pulled it out for her, and she swung around and punched me in the face».

A week later, Peter was surprised to see Dan with yet another black eye.
«I was at church …» he began to explain. «I was sitting behind the same fat lady again, and when we was to sing the hymn, her dress had once again sneaked into her buttcrack.»
«My little nephew leaned forward and pulled the dress out this time, but I knew she didn’t like it, so I tucked it back in».

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